Friday, March 12, 2010

Do Not Get Me Started

The following statements originated as a series of tweets in response to an article about whites adopting black children. Whether the forum is this blog, Twitter, or elsewhere in the universe or cyberspace, my opinions on the matter remain set in stone. Hopefully anyone who happens upon these words is enlightened enough to agree with them, not because I require validation, but because I treasure common sense precisely because it is less common than its name suggests.

ABC Pushes View Whites Should Not Adopt Black Children... I’m going to offer my take on this subject so multi-tweets on the way.

I’m always up for a respectful debate, but in certain cases such as this one, if you disagree with me it’s simply because you’re wrong.

Debate is prominent at moment due to success of Blind Side, a film I haven’t seen yet so don’t have much to say about.

But I know in Blind Side white person(s) adopt a black kid, thus kick starting national debate about how damaging interracial adoption potentially is.

First off, parenting in general is potentially damaging. Awful parents cause screwed up kids. Adoption/race has nothing to do with this.

Secondly, our foster care system (while having some wonderful participants) is deeply flawed, and even more so is growing up in the modern day equivalents to orphanages.

Having a home, having parents, is pretty much ALWAYS the better option whether the kid looks like carbon copy of parents or not.

If someone is adopting, goal is rarely if ever to weaken strength of an ethnicity just as goal of gay adoptive parents is not typically orientation conversion.

That said, there are ill conceived ways to do something and superior ways to go about it. This applies to interracial adoption same as to anything else.

I do not think it’s the best idea for a white couple living in an exclusively white area without any/many black friends to adopt a black child.

If white adoptive parents of black child have no intention of making concerted effort to expose child to black culture- bad idea, bad plan.

It’s still a better plan than orphanage/foster care I must add. But well short of what I’d call ideal.

If community & cultural exposure is mixed there is no harm at all done by interracial adoption. Nothing wrong w/ rainbow coalition.

As an adult later on the kid will pick who he feels more comfortable hanging with, but family is family. This reality also has nothing to do with adoption.

There are many white ppl more into “black culture” than certain black ppl. So we’re really talking matching skin tones more than culture here.

If black people opposed to interracial adoption are doing something about this belief by adopting, I can somewhat respect their principle.

But if you’re complaining abt a situation yet doing nada to alter or affect it, just making noise, I not that respectfully urge you to STFU.

Previous tweet applies to pretty much any situation btw, not just interracial adoption. Make a difference or else remain silent on sideline.

Back to Blind Side, I have no idea if movie makers made a conscious effort to give appearance of white heroes saving black people.

But I’d guess it is simply a particular story about a specific true life inspired situation and not making any grand statements/indictments.

Sometimes the savior in a certain situation happens to be white and the one needing to be rescued is black. Not a fault, a fact.

And if the rescuer is black and the rescued white, same deal, just the way things worked out that time.

To blame person for being white while heroic (I’m not calling adoption heroic by definition btw) is monstrously moronic. Goodness is goodness.

Live and let live. Love and let love. Be and let be. Have both an open mind and heart. If you must judge someone, find a mirror.

Fantastic article that I highly recommend reading!


  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  2. Since writing this post I have seen The Blind Side. Well, most of it anyway. Not much to say in review beyond I found it to be a pretty decent and interesting flick.